it’s friday afternoon and tomorrow i pick up the director’s gauntlet and jump back into the fray. i’ve never directed a narrative film before so this is all strange and new to me. last weekend went well, view overall, malady although it was a HUGE challenge for me. i spent most of the week physically recuperating, and then screwed myselfs by going to value village yesterday.
i know, what was i thinking? what person goes to a value village, a value village of all places, when they have to direct a film in two days?
certainly not someone with chemical sensitivities.
i knew there was something wrong when i entered the store, but did that stop me, oh noooo, i just HAD to pick up a sheet for the show this weekend, and a few dresses while i was at it. shame! shame on me! ok yes this is sarcasm, kinda, but i did know there was something wrong with the air quality and i went inside anyways. once i was inside my brain got addled from the chemicals and it didn’t occur to me that i had to get out of there for quite some time.
it’s a tricky thing, directing a film while juggling several disabilities. especially since my symptoms are easily triggered by outside influences like chemicals and stress. but it’s a film, which means when you’re in production everyone has to be there at the same time working in the same direction. which is why i spent most of the week in bed. not only because i was too sick to get up, but because i knew that if i didn’t take really good care, i might not make it to the next weekend’s shoot.
last weekend i wondered if the folks on set thought i was being silly all the times i just collapsed on the floor. i am pretty silly, and i do weird things all the time. and really, it’s not exactly the end of the world. needing to lay down, immediately, is par for the course at any given moment for me.
well, if you’re reading this, pray that my chemical exposure doesn’t stop me from doing my job.
also, chemically sensitive seattle-ites, stay away from the value village in capitol hill.